Women are supposed to automatically tap into their parental intuition as soon as they become mothers, however I am not so sure I was given that gene. My husband on the other hand seems to have tapped into his. Last night for example, he “intuitively” knew that my son was putting reams of toilet paper down the loo – how was this possible? I dismissed it at the time, but sure enough this morning I find my son in the bathroom unraveling the paper straight down the toilet so he could get to the ‘telescope’! When I asked my husband how he knew, he just said “I don’t know, I just had this feeling“.
I have a friend who amazes me when it comes to intuition. I remember being at a mutual friends house one time where her husband was on the balcony with her two children. They were not visible to us, but mid sentence she swans out of the room and scolds the children for climbing the balcony rails. Now, I’ve heard of (and possess) eye’s in the back of your head, but x-ray vision!?!? Her husband didn’t even have time to react before she instinctively knew the kids would try to climb up. This woman is clearly connected to her intuition beyond my comprehension.
My Mum also possessed this “power”. Many of my friends parents did too. How on earth did they know what you would do before you had even thought about doing it? How is it possible that those mums knew EVERYTHING? You can’t even put it down to past behaviours or even knowing your child, these people seriously have some eerie psychic shit going on.
Even though I think my intuition may be a bit skewed, I’m not saying I am a bad parent. In fact, I’m pretty damned good if I do say so myself! I think though that my parental skills are mostly based on knowledge and learned behaviour rather than intuition. You see although I was the ‘baby’of 7 children, my mum used to mind anywhere up to 30 children at my house as I was growing up. I therefore have years of experience in dealing with children of all ages so much of it comes as second nature, but intuition, I’m not so sure mine is that finely tuned.
Are my parenting skills based on common sense rather than intuition? Do I rationalise everything too much? Am I too scared to rely on my own gut instinct? Do I fall into the trap of over thinking things. Do my anxieties go into overdrive and cloud my judgement (as you know by now….I worry, I worry a lot!). To sum up, how do I know whether I am making a decision based on anxiety or intuition or even instinct versus intuition?
With these questions in mind, I did as I always do….research, research, research!
Instinct versus intuition is a much easier puzzle to solve. I think my instincts are sound. The actions I do in an instant without thought are in fine working order, but the intuition side is still a little muddled. So, after wading through quite a few ‘airy fairy’ accounts of what intuition is, I found one that stated that intuition is where you are able to perceive something that is not plainly evident, where you can see beyond the obvious. Ok, so I can think of many times in the past where I have used my intuitive skills with friends or with clients. I can think of times where I’ve slapped myself upside the head because I didn’t listen to myself, but can I think of moments where intuition kicked in with my son?
As I pondered this question, I came across an article that explained that sometimes the less you analyse the pros and cons when it comes to decisions, the happier you are in the long term. The longer you mull over the decision, the less satisfied you are. There are many times where my anxieties take over when it comes to my son. Like every parent I want the world to be at his feet so I think about things that can go wrong, but for the most part, I just do what I do not in fear but in love. Maybe that is the answer….I do use my intuition. I do what feels right. Looking at the evidence in front of me, whatever it is I am doing, I am doing a bloody brilliant job of it, so why mess with it by over analysing it? 🙂
How well developed is your parental intuition?
Do you have a story of when your parental intuition kicked in?